It has been awhile.. since i post on this blog.
I want to blog. Blog at somewhere that peoples hardly to find out. So here it is.
These words came from deepest side in my heart.

What's wrong with you and what's wrong with me?

Why do we have to argue everytime because of her?
Please tell me why?
It's not that i love to bring up this topic.
It's just that you don't understand how do i feel whenever you layan her. and you've choose not to understand.

Who i am in your heart?
Who she is in your heart?

Why can't you keep your promise to me?
Why did you break it?
Why did you break it because of her?
Why her?

You can finished the phone credit in 2 to 3 days times just to chat with her.
It's not about the money issue im talking about.
It's about me, YOUR GIRLFRIEND, ME!!
Who i am to you?

I hate her.
Because she ruined our relationship over and over again.

and i begins to hate you.
because you stand on her side whenever we argued.

I'm fucking dissapointed when i knew you lied to me.

I'm fucking sad because you don't get me, i don't get you.

I'm fucking depress because i have to check your handphone everytime.

You know what, i hate to do this.
because i don't trust you.

I don't know how to build my trust to you.

You broke my trust to you. It's you!

I'm fucking sick because of this.
Don't you get it?

Tell me if its wrong to help you to save money?
You says i shouldn't intefere your life?
just because i asked you to watch movie some other day? with me?
I just wanted to accompany you so that you won't be alone.
I'm your girlfriend and you're my boyfriend.
I would still wanted to accompany you for the movie eventhough i had never watch before.

Once again, i shed my tears.

I feel so insecure.

I don't mind if you're broke. I don't mind at all!! even it is so hard to go thru.. i just don't mind, its because i love you.

Whenever you layan her, you just don't have any idea that you have broke my heart.

and i'm the one who picking up the pieces.

I hate whenever you say ok, but you know you're not ok then you bring it up when we argue.

I hate that alot..

You says i like to pick up the fight everytime, don't care wether you are sick, unwell, or whatever.

Have you ever think about who is the one who made this things to become a fight?

You says there's many things you have to worry about.. its the reason that i shouldn't pick up fight with you.

What about me?

My studies? My family? My financial?

You sounds that i have nothing to worry about.

I dislike you say sorry to me when you don't even mean it.
you know why. because things happens over and over again. Repeating.
yet you don't realize.

I feel thankful that whatever you did it to me.

You have no idea how i appreciate whatever things you done it to me.
You bought me cloths. I wear it twice a week.
The first time that you gave me pocket money, I keep the note until now. Eventhough i'm broke, i didn't use it.
I keep the movie tickets.
Whenever we go out, i hold your hand tightly.. it's because i appreciate the time when we're together.

Do you know that?

I bet you don't even know..

If I don't love you that much, I won't give a damn whoever that you chat with.
If I don't love you that much, I won't be sitting down here and still crying since all the way you send me home.
If I don't love you, i won't hugs you tightly...